Saturday, June 12, 2010

you. have. got. to . be. kidding

he's perfect.
she's very cool.
I never made the connection. no way.
yes, I realise there was no chance at all in any way, but I still reserve my right to be so very disappointed.
all I can hope is that it is very new. or they were friends for ages. something to stupidly hold onto. idiot.
ps. i have de brows and you don't?? there's summit

Friday, June 11, 2010

Sense made

Well now.
Learning new information,
It can be simultaneously liberating and crushing.
Sometimes I just don't want to know but with that knowledge, I am so clearly better off.
How is it always the same informer too? Yet... There are other things being held back.
Sick of seconds, this is the benefit of independence. We all know it would never have been me.
I'll just go get my own and you can all piss off.

This Sex Which Is Not One.

Within the vast amounts of information I am trying to sort through for this essay, I rediscovered Luce Iragaray. She has this to say about woman and her pleasure, how it differs from man's in the masculine normalised society we live in;

"As for woman, she touches herself in and of herself without any need for mediation, and before there is any way to distinguish between activity from passivity. Woman "touches herself" all the time, and moreover no one can forbid her to do so, for her genitals are formed of two lips in continuous contact. Thus, within herself, she is already two-but not divisible into one(s)-that caress each other."

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Just.. writing essays...

Just this morning I started watching The Inbetweeners. Probably not the best time to get hooked on yet another british comedy but... it was a pleasing distraction. Not yet sure if I can deal with all the isms within though.

At least things can only get better. Or they could just stay the same.... Or get worse

Sunday, June 6, 2010


Cold weather + Arthritis = Feck I need to walk around.

And... just... I don't know. Yet again. How oft' shall I turn away at the signpost?

Friday, June 4, 2010

About you.

I am getting to that point. Paranoia (not really... but really) sets in and every unpredictable thing makes me nervous. It's clearly all about me, right? Wrong. It never is. Then I feel worse for even thinking for that fleeting moment that it could be about me. Even this post has become about me to a greater extend than I expected it to. I suppose... since it is my life... it has to be about me in some way. I don't want it to be though. I want it to be about everybody else, but I want to be part of their life because my life is all about their life. I think I just said some really straightforward stuff and for no purpose. Or, if there were purpose, it was to sort out my mind. Yeah okay shuddup.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Midnight Man

It catches up with you y'know.
These days I look at the beauty of things, simple things like the sky, trees, and I think "you're too ugly to be here"
I don't know how I became like this.

Tuesday, June 1, 2010


i guess i've done it to him though.
must. stop.